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Camping
June 2002
My father was (and still is) both frugal and an Eagle
scout. It is most likely the latter that influenced our summer vacations
the most. Eschewing the popular resorts and hotels, my family would go
camping each summer. After all, you get to tromp through the woods, play
with fire, stay up late, eat junk food and sleep outside. This being summertime,
the subject of camping deserves further exploration.
My father was a purist (or a cheapest!). We didn't
need those creature comforts of a camper or air mattress. That would be
"Plastic Camping". Oh, there was one summer when we almost went camping
in the Disney World campground (a compromise on my father's part to be
sure), but alas, the refrigerator needed replacing, canceling our resort/camping
plans. Now most audiences would be asking, "How long could that have possibly
taken to swap out?!?" But I know that "home schooler" and "frugal" are
synonyms, and we are still on the same page.
As a kid, camping was not the ends of our expeditions,
but rather the means. Traveling the eastern seaboard (Yes, I'm a "Yankee"),
we would head off north or south to find battlefields and historic villages
in remembrance of Revolutionary and Civil war heroics. Bunker Hill, Gettysburg
and Antietem, just to name a few… or in search of Colonial life to places
like Mystic Seaport, Williamsburg or Old Sturbridge Village. Each of these
was in close proximity to some campground. Sometimes we would just head
out for a distant point, like Cadillac Mountain in Maine for blueberry
picking (and lobster for Mom), or Boonesboro, Kentucky, for a coonskin
cap (No Raccoons were actually hurt during the production of those caps,
but Boonsboro is home to a particularly large population of bald varmints).
Camping can actually be broken up into four stages.
Kid camping, Youth camping, Adult camping and Parent camping. Kid camping
is all about FUN. And camping can't help but be fun for a kid. After all,
you get to tromp through the woods, play with fire, stay up late, eat
junk food and sleep outside. Even when it rains, you don't have to stay
inside! Outside of the occasional twisted ankle, stumbling into the yellow
jacket nest, sunburn, splinter and burnt marshmallow; camping is designed
for you.
No longer content to burn marshmallows in the fire,
and sacrificially locating all the poison ivy within fifty yards of your
campsite (before dawn!), Youth camping requires adventure. For me, adventure
came in three forms: rock climbing, tubing and no parents. If parents
had been there (which I fully intend to be), there would have been no
rock climbing and no tubing (and no sleeping in, donut & bacon breakfasts,
or stew-eaten-off-the-bare-ground-because-we-only-had-sticks-to-get-it-off-the-fire-in-the-dark-with).
Youth camping can take anti-plastic camping to new heights (or lows).
Preparing and consuming an entire week of meals with only a stick and
a leftover McDonalds "spork". Starting a fire with the cigarette lighter
from your car and some belly-button lint (it's like manna… new batch every
day). Fortunately, time (or is it Providence?) only allows so much adventure
before adulthood sets in.
Adult camping is much different. A few nights out as
young marrieds, and we began to wonder why this was ever a big deal. The
mosquitoes. The rock-hard ground. The loud neighbors. The strange animals
rummaging through your campsite at night. The fact that morning comes
so early, and the sun can sure heat up a tent quickly and doubles as a
makeshift alarm clock. Forget it. And men, we have to admit that the whole
Blazing Saddles reenactment thing loses more than a little of its charm
in mixed company.
But then it comes full circle. Parent camping is all
about Kid camping again. Parents camp because it is about the cheapest
form of entertainment to be found (you get to turn your A/C off back home,
and use someone else's water). Kid camping makes a lot more sense after
you have Parent camped - like where all those hot meals come from, how
the car gets packed while you were off riding your bike and why they make
sleeping bags that zip together. And besides, you get to tromp through
the woods, play with fire, stay up late, eat junk food and sleep outside!
Sadly, parent camping is the last stage. After that
you sell out. Although my folks would claim to be in the Empty Nest camping
stage, we all know that is not true. What they call camping would make
the father I once knew cringe. Sleeping on an air mattress in the back
of a mini-van with the seats removed. They've lost all self-respect.
Some of you parents have already sold out. You are
the ones with those nice, big comfortable pop-up campers with air conditioning,
gas ranges, running water and satellite dishes. Yes, that is us you hear
banging on your door at 2am during the torrential downpour trying to be
heard over the roaring thunder. If you let us in, I'll let you wear my
coonskin cap!
Have a great summer and make some great family memories…
AFTER the conference, that is!
Brett
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Camping Graphics supplied by Anne's
Summer Vacation Gifs
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